Sunday, April 15, 2012

The Confessions of a Volunteer

My whining heart tingled,
You're not that warm or nice
What are you going to do there-
Is that ego in disguise?

I groped along in darkness,
Trying hard to find that light -
And no it didn't just come along
We had no heroes, no fight.

I wept alone in silence,
Could stories really end that way?
There had to be that happy end,
I'll wait, I thought, I'll stay.

I watched and watched,
and watched and watched, it couldn't really be like that -
If I could watch just a wee bit more,
It would come, and I knew that.

Guess what, it didnt - And I'm still there
Though my flimsy heart now sings:
I've understood, I knew I would -
Its hope that gives us wings.

Dedicated to: The children of Ummeed Aman Ghar and the Volunteer DilSe Campaign

"Hope is grief's best music. -Author Unknown"
PS. I've been itching to flaunt this card for months now!

I've had my own set of crazy inhibitions with social work. An Ayn Rand fan and "wannabe corporate" (whatever that is!), I couldn't relate to the concept of being selfess. I still can't, not totally, but my experiences at Ummeed have atleast given me different lines of thought.
I have learnt how happiness, and wealth, to a very large extent, are mutually exclusive. Yes, this is cliched -but I've seen proof!
I've also learnt that life is undeniably unfair, but then, people are incredibly good-natured as well. It's like nature's balance.
I'm still grappling with issues of selfishness, but the happiness that I felt when Babu recognized me on Saturday (I thought all of them must've forgotten me - I was coming back after 3 months) totally made my day and actually compelled me to write this post.

I'm honoured, more aware of myself and maybe even a little more sensitive than before.
Thank you Ummeed.

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